I’m always impressed by professional bloggers who can keep up with an online blog. Obviously I’m not that great. I guess the main reason is that I always feel like I have nothing worthwhile to say, that my life is so boring that no one really wants to read about it. Then again, most of the blogs I like don’t have anything to do with life but are actually just thoughts and dreams that we are lucky enough to be a part of.

I’ve always been better at keeping an old fashioned journal, pen and paper. Even then my track record is embarrassing. I can look through my old journals and there will be two entries 7 months apart, and that’s just my own personal story! I’ve been doing better recently though. Sometime I just need the proper motivation. I’m currently working through the Book of Awakening, an awesome little daily meditation book that gives me prompts when I am stuck and really don’t want to talk about vaccines anymore. It’s an awesome book, one that explores different aspects of existence that aren’t touched on very much.

Living in the Bible Belt for as long as I have, I’ve seen many of the narrower definitions of Christianity, few of which appeal to me anymore. It’s not that I don’t believe in God — quite the opposite really — just that I don’t accept the examples I’ve been given as a true representation of who He really is. I’m sure that most of my religious views now would shock a good Baptist into a heart attack, and I’d be lying if I said that doesn’t make me smile a little. I have a hard time reconciling the image of a loving God with such a vehement hatred toward other people, and frankly, I’ve just decided that the examples people are setting are not in the true nature of the Divine. I’ve felt closer to God in my yoga studio than any church I’ve ever been to, and if I want to use non-church-approved methods of seeking Him out, then I will and I will no longer feel guilty about it. If one can’t recognize God in everything and everyone around them, they are missing the whole point.

I recently finished reading the entire Chronicles of Narnia (yes, I know I’m a bit behind), and needless to say, if the were a church of C. S. Lewis, I would probably go there. It’s not just the Narnia books, every work I have read by him sums up a lot of what I believe. I hate to spoil the ending for anyone who hasn’t read the books, but I have to share my favorite part. (And if I say that The Last Battle is pretty much the book of Revelations, I won’t be ruining anything.). At the end, Aslan meets a man who belonged to a different religion and sought out a different god (Tash), who essentially represents the devil. Aslan tells him that he counts all of the good works this guy did to be in his service. The guy can’t understand why Aslan hasn’t sent him away and is asking if the rumors were true that Aslan and Tash were one in the same. Aslan tells him that it’s because they are polar opposites that he counts his service to him, saying that a man cannot do good works, even in the name of Tash, and truly be serving him, because Tash is pure evil. Likewise, he also tells the man that he can never accept an act of evil, even if the act is committed in his name, because one cannot do evil and serve him. Deep thoughts, but how powerful is that? That one cannot do good works without serving God, and no evil can be done in service to God, even if it is done in His name. How would living by that principle change how we interact with each other? Instead of worrying about condemning each other to hell and persecuting each other, what would happen if we chose only to do good, to only seek out good, chose to love each other instead of pointing out faults? Sounds more like the truth of the teachings of Christ than what most churches are focused on these days. Hence why I no longer attend. I will choose to seek God in whatever way connects me to all of His creation and attempt to live the example of unconditional love that He set.

I will try to do better at keeping up. I say that every time and fail miserably, but maybe there is someone out there who, like me, is frustrated by the religious extremists and doctrines of hate who just wants to know that God is still out there, still loving them, even if those who claim to hate in His name do not. If that person finds this and is inspired by it, the I consider it to be a good work.

(P.S. I’ve tried to catch all mistakes, but it something doesn’t make sense, it’s because my autocorrect apparently had a little too much coffee this morning. Or something, half of the “corrections” aren’t words in the English language.)

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